the end of an era…

This morning seems like an end of an era for the Behoney family!

We have essentially been living out of suitcases for 2 years!
In March of 2011 we packed up all of our belongings, loaded it into a big storage unit, and traveled into the unknown.
Now…today after almost 10,000 miles driven, 27 spare bedrooms & hotel rooms, and a year of airstream trailer living….. jobs have been acquired, our boy has grown a foot & speaks in full sentences, we finally have moved into our very own HOUSE!!! Today a big truck carrying a storage unit full of our life lived up until 2011 will pull into our drive & unload in our very empty house!

We are feeling so very grounded right now & so very excited about this new chapter in our lives! We have a 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom house in the beautiful Zilker neighborhood of Austin, TX! Every evening we drive through a canopy of amazing oak trees, pull into our very own driveway & walk through the door of our very own home. It is amazing when you live without things for a while how the little things become so BIG and gratitude pours into the seemingly mundane….
I am in LOVE with our full size refrigerator & a freezer that makes its own ice!!! Chopping orange peels in the garbage disposal makes me smile! & being able to take a bath is heaven!

And then the not so mundane – - – In this new house one of my lifelong dreams is on it’s way to coming true! I am starting a preschool! I will get to watch our little Teigen & some other lucky children learn & grow, imagine & create, laugh & socialize, sing & dance their way through these very fun preschool years! So excited!

I’m doing my best to create a website…Please note that my talents are more in the actual teaching of children & my 2 big challenges are explaining what I do & anything very techie

http://www.austinbloompreschool.com

…and on to our next adventures!

Updated – our movers Pete & Angie were AMAZING!!! They are the sweetest married couple with 5 grown kids and have been moving peoples stuff through uship for 6 years.  If you ever need movers – use them!
(& tell them we sent you)

http://www.uship.com/profile/Chase313/

They were bringing this golf cart on to some lucky golfer in FL
T would have loved for it to stay!

Pete & Angie.  This was a go cart going on to Georgia.

Our not so tiny Teigen is loving playing the baby Teigen game.

& this is the sweet new puppy from next door who loves to come over & visit!

the days are long and the years are short

Toddler days can sometime seem to drag on forever.
Didn’t we already play ‘save the baby sea lion’ 27 times?
Did we not just put out that fire?

But I turn around and we have already been in Austin almost a year.  Where has the time gone? How do those never-ending days turn our babbling baby into a ‘Why’ asking 2 1/2 year old?  Time really is so so precious!…. Lately I’ve been putting pressure on myself not to waste it.  We have been missing our great big wonderful family like crazy and miss sharing this fabulous little boy with everyone who loves him.

We have to remind ourselves about the reasons we chose to move here in the first place & the experience we have given this growing boy & ourselves.  The space, the kindness, the warmth, the stars, did i mention the space?  Oh the space in TX is so good for our busy little guy!…and the ground that he falls on is usually pretty soft

We just got back from a trip to CA where we were filled up with so much love, so much beauty.  The sounds of the ocean mixed with a feeling of home.  Not sure anymore where exactly home is.  It is with family.  It is ‘TT’s house’. It is wherever Ker, T & I are.

There should be a special word for the feeling of sharing love for someone!
It happens….
….when Ker & I sit back together & watch Teigen play.
….when we make hot chocolate with my sister, T says something sweet in his amazing little voice, Margy & I share a ‘can you believe his cuteness?!?’ look, the moment makes me cry
….when Mema & Grandad spend an evening with T and can understand his little language the next day.
….when Papa Matthew has spent a week here and knows exactly which of Teigen’s tools are his most favorite.

This sharing of love, this mutual joy that we all experience because Teigen exists in the world.  It is so good!
It reminds me to treasure every little moment & it makes me so very grateful for everyone who holds Teigen in their hearts like i do! -& it makes me want more, more of these:

from my heart

I am the kind of person who can’t handle watching, reading or listening to the news.  - and  I always stay out of anything political.  It’s just too traumatic when I do! I get all riled up, have stomach aches & can’t sleep.  I do realize I need to somewhat stay on top of things so I know what’s going on in the world.  I usually just rely on Kerry to be my filter & tell me only the important things.  But given the upcoming elections….I have been tuning in.  Needless to say……I’m not getting much sleep.

What a completely different election year this is from 4 years ago.  We were living in San Francisco & felt this united front of HOPE!  Everyone was swept up by Obama and his dreams and hopes for change!  Ker & I were married in the morning!…& then joined the millions of voters casting their ballot for a better tomorrow.  The overwhelming win filled us all and joined us as a country.  The excitement, the feeling, the hope & joy was palpable!

Nov 4th, 2008

-voting-

Now here we are 4 years later, living in TX with our sweet little trio.  And I am personally so scared of what will happen if Romney is elected.  In California I felt taken care of and protected as a gay family.  In Texas – not as much.  With this upcoming election, I am just scared.

When we ended up in the ER with Teigen waiting for 6 hours, exhausted & hungry… we were so worried that if Ker left to go grab food they wouldn’t let her back to be with us.  We overheard “Are you a blood relative?” asked of another visitor.  So we decided to just stick together and make that our priority.  How very sad that we had to even feel worried about that.
We did go home and researched our current rights as a gay family today in TX.
Our marriage is not recognized here, however, under Obamacare Kerry is legally able to be in a hospital setting with us.
The next week Romney announces that he believes it is a benefit, not a right, for gay family members to have hospital visitation rights.

Romney: Hospital Visitation For Gay Couples Are ‘Benefits’ Not Rights.

This made me sick to my stomach…..especially having recently felt so raw in our parenthood experience.  I cannot imagine having to do this by myself, some nurse telling us that we can’t both be by our son’s side. Or what if something happened to Kerry and I wasn’t able to be by her side? It is just not right. Many people I know and love will be going into that voting booth this upcoming week and will essentially be helping take rights away from me, my family, my son, my community ….oh, this one, this is truly upsetting.

“I didn’t know you had families.” -Mitt Romney to a group of gay parents

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*The above post was inspired by the following email Teigen’s Poppy Matthew wrote last week.

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Hey family,

I’d like a moment of your time to talk politics. I’m not asking for a response or disclosure of your vote. In fact, if we disagree, I’d really rather not know. (Truly.) But we are entrenched in the new civil rights movement of my generation and this election could make a HUGE impact on my life and that of my son, so much more so than a different tax rate.

Romney and Ryan believe that I am less than you. They believe I am a second class citizen and don’t deserve the same rights that you had the privilege of being born into simply by being straight. They want to add a constitutional amendment that will ban gay marriage forever. It will set us back decades and ensure that Daniel and I never have the opportunity to be legally wed, despite our 13 years together.

They also believe that being at your partner’s side when he/she is dying is a benefit, not a civil right. They could keep me from seeing Daniel if, God forbid, he was dying in a hospital. Could you even imagine something like that in your own life? Being separated from your spouse on their death bed? Could you imagine your marriage never being recognized and being told that your family is not a family and you do not deserve any federal rights that come with marriage. Over 1100 rights. Did you know that? 1100.

Ryan doesn’t believe in the Hate Crimes Act fought for unwaveringly by Judy Shepard, mother of Matthew Shepard, murdered in Wyoming for being gay. Murdered for being gay. Could you imagine if I was murdered for being myself? Who could look my mother in the eye and say ‘Sorry, we just can’t prosecute this crime as a hate crime’?

I know there are important issues involved in this campaign. I know people are suffering and the economy has not improved at a rate we all wish it would. But the gay and lesbian community has been suffering for hundreds of years. I know history will eventually right this. We are so close and I want it it to be in my lifetime, not just for myself but for all of us. And I want a president who believes that you and I are equal. Aren’t we?Obama said to my community “You are equal to everyone else in this country and I will fight for your rights. The time is now and it is long overdue.” Romney and Ryan disagree and it makes me especially sad for every gay and questioning child who might have to listen to a president who believes that he/she is a 2nd class citizen. The tragic reality is children will take their lives. It is the WORST form of trickle down bullying and it absolutely tears my heart in two. When the president says you are less than, it gives permission to every authority figure, every politician, every teacher, every bully on the playground to push you around and bully you and treat you as less than. It is dangerous and lives will be lost. Isn’t that too steep a cost?

I know some of you hate Obama. But please consider if another 4 years with him in office could possibly cause the harm to you and yours in the way Romney will mine. I love you and know you love me, or else I wouldn’t ask. Please just sit with it and think about all the implications on November 6th.

Much love,
Matthew

“Falling down is part of life, Getting back up is living”

I have been trying to count how many times I have caught T from near disaster. I’m sure it’s gotta be near 2,000! Does that make me feel any better about not catching him on Monday? Not really.

Teigen is a busy busy moving active little boy who is going to fall & I’m not always going to be there to catch him. What a sad & real thing to come to terms with.

This past Monday afternoon T fell the shortest little distance at the park and bent the 2 bones in his forearm.  He now has a very fancy blue cast covering his whole arm.

We took him to the best ER (because we new better this time) at Dell Children’s Hospital & they were so sweet and wonderful to be with for 7 hours.
Teigen did so so so great! Only a little crying once it got past his 8:30 bedtime and all he wanted to do was eat or nurse or go home -none of which were allowed.

We finally headed out at 11:30pm & I cannot tell you how grateful I am for the invention of the drive-thru pharmacy!!!
Ker was home through this all with a nasty cold… So, I felt so helpless with our casted up, exhausted boy, a prescription for much needed pain meds & no one to run into the store at midnight to pick them up. Thank You God for drive through pharmacies!!!

We go in for a follow up visit & X-rays on Monday. They should tell us then how long it will be on. They thought 3-4 weeks… But, could be longer.

Now we get creative with some non-climbing, no-jumping, no-wrestling activities for our one armed boy!

Teigen’s resilience amazes me to no end!  He woke up the day after getting his cast with “Mommy, take off”.  Luckily Teigen fairly easily accepted the fact that he has to keep this cast on & has embraced a life of doing everything with his right hand.  He has even figured out how to hold 2 trucks in one hand.  -yes! life can go on!

 

 

 

Falling down is part of life,
     Getting back up is LIVING!
                             -shuja sayeed

 

 

The long long trailer

We are living a little bit “off the grid” these days. For the last 3 months we have been living in a vintage 1950′s airstream trailer in the Travis Heights neighborhood of Austin, Texas.

Sometimes, like today, it feels like we are on a camping adventure! Today big, beautiful Texas raindrops dance on our tin roof, music that feeds my soul right up! Later Teigen will put on his rain boots and run outside in search of the biggest puddle to stomp in! But, right now we enjoy a sweet rainy naptime. Mmmmm!

Our trailer sometimes feels bigger than a little city apartment…. Especially when we open the front door and really take in all this land we live on!
…. & then somedays it feels so tiny & crowded & I dream about the day when we will have a wider hallway! When we won’t crack our arm if a door happens to be half open. Ouch!

Here are some pics from the back to the front:

Our bedroom – basically just a king size bed.

Kitchen/bathroom to the right includes a mini tub just Teigen’s size!

Living room/Teigen’s playroom & kitchen. Teigen makes coffee with me every morning!

Our deck after the rain.

Our beautiful oak tree that drops acorn bombs on us (they are so loud on our tin roof!)! Teigen loves collecting the acorns and making soups, smoothies, & acorn coffee with them.

Here’s our yard.

Here’s T & some buddies.

& here are some of Teigen’s favorite outdoor pasttimes….

This is the trailer for one of my most favorite childhood movies!!!  Desi Arnaz’s bath/shower scene cracks me up & it’s just like ours!  - But, ours stays up.
It blows me away that someone pulled this thing behind their car!

My Heart

Having a child truthfully is to have your heart walking around outside of your body!  -or stumbling, jumping, running, climbing & falling outside of your body!

Yesterday Teigen had his first major fall – one that even mama’s hug & kiss can’t fix. He tripped & hit the bridge of his nose on the side of a table at the farmers market. Nose injuries can be so bloody! Everyone around us was so wonderful! Parents pulled first-aid kits out of bags, handed us bandages & wipes; one mom ran to a vendor & put together a makeshift ice pack with a plastic glove & ice, other parents directed us to the closest hospital. And we were with a friend who’s daughter recently had a dog bite ER trip. It felt like he was the pro at this and helped calmly ward off other concerned children & get us back to our car & on our way. The camaraderie & community that surrounded us at such a scary time warmed my heart!
Thank you to all the parents who jumped in and took care of us yesterday!!!

Then we spent the next 4 hours basically waiting, crying, waiting, crying, nursing, waiting & finally got in to see someone right after Teigen had fallen asleep. The maddening thing in the ER is all the nurses just waiting around behind the desk -it seems like they’d have something to do!!! Or at least they should wait somewhere where we can’t see them.

Check out that guy in the background.  He was in that exact position, arms folded, leaning against a wall, bored to death like the rest of us…..for at least 1/2 the time we were there waiting.  2 hours of leaning?!?!?  really!?!?

T after finally falling asleep, right before they woke him up to clean & dress his wound. OUCH!  Luckily, they decided not to do actual stitches. And I am thanking the good lord for the invention of liquid stitches!
It still broke my heart to have to hold our boy down as the doctor cleaned him up and applied the magical glue that holds his upper nose together today…..but I am so so so glad they didn’t have to actually stitch him up.  Double Ouch!
After they were done, Teigen cried “Oh No Mommy….That!?!?” pointing to his nose.  He really did not understand what was happening.

A child’s resilience will never cease to amaze me!  

As soon as we were done and out of there, Teigen was happily singing in the backseat & ready to get back to his busy world of playing.  Ker & I, on the other hand, felt like we had been hit by a huge mac truck!

……..Teigen last night.

& this is Teigen today….busy playing.  A bit puffy & bruised and a little confused about the random pains.  Every once in a while he says, “Bubble Eye” because the closest pain he can associate to this is when he had some bath bubbles in his eyes.

Oh My Heart!

reaching new heights

What we Play is Life

-Louis Armstrong

Being a mom of a toddler means watching life itself unfold right before your eyes.
Every day is a new learning adventure!

Teigen is such a great life teacher too
So, I find it important to pay attention & learn.

Recently he has been into making things VERY high.
He carries his step stool around so he can see things from new heights. So he can reach things, so he can be even bigger than he already is. -very understandable coming from a 3 ft tall person.

He is also VERY much into building towers!
He stacks blocks on blocks on trucks on cars,
He stacks cucumbers on pasta on trains,
he stacks containers in the kitchen.
And what is amazing to stand back & watch is the happy persistence that takes place with all this stacking.

We watch as he stacks a huge container on top of a flimsy tea box, we see it buckle under the weight, we
know it is going to topple, but, we don’t step in to help. Why?
Because we know it will topple
and he will be fine with it
and he will try and try again.
He may make the same mistake over & over and he will keep trying and trying. At some point he will figure it out & we trust the process.

Today’s tip from a toddler…
Don’t give up!
If at first you don’t succeed…..Well, you know what to do!